'He went through the automatic car wash in an office chair': 30+ Workplace mishaps that were unforgettably hilarious

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    What's the most hilarious thing you have seen at your workplace?
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    [deleted] I work in a hospital lab, and on a Monday morning I came in and saw this email: To whom it may concern: "I had two cupcakes and put them in the Core Lab break room refrigerator last night on the evening shift and someone ate one of them. The cupcakes were for my dogs and they contain raw meat. If you ate the cupcake and don't feel well, please see a doctor. I don't want you to get sick and end up with E. coli or Salmonella."
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    soomuchcoffee The CEO sends a cryptic email saying he has a big announcement. He's an older dude so people immediately start worrying that he's either announcing his retirement, or announcing the sale of the company, or something like that. At the time we were having a great year, but people were still freaking out that maybe he sold and now our futures are in jeopardy.
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    Everyone shuffled into the conference room, where he's there with a microphone. There's champagne and candy on a table. He goes into this spiel about how it was our best year ever, and he couldn't be more proud, and he heard the retirement rumors but it won't be any time soon. So there's 100 people in this room like "Ok...so...?" The tension was unreal.
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    "Please help yourself to some candy. Also, the executives and I are going on a Caribbean cruise to celebrate! Join me in congratulating them on this great success!" What followed was the most tepid, dumbfounded round of applause I have ever heard. I felt like I was on an episode of The Office. The fun sized M&MS were good though.
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    Techpaste IT Consultant here. I currently work for a demo/plant hire firm. One of the not-so-bright yard workers was breaking down some reclaimed materials next to a skip. As he's chopping away with his little axe, he notices a can of expanding foam, brings it towards him and, for some strange reason, he decides to hit it REALLY J hard with the axe. All I heard was a loud bang and a lot of swearing. He
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    walks out from behind the skip, noticeably expanding due to sheer volume of this stuff he had on him. He looked like a very confused, orange Marshmallow man.
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    Haceldama At a funeral I was working, I watched the estranged mother of the deceased try to threaten and intimidate the young widow. Thing is, mom didn't speak English and the widow didn't understand a word of spanish, so while mom was telling her how she was going to pay for taking her son away from her and from his country and how she'd make her life miserable, the widow was just smiling and nodding. The mom was
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    getting increasingly frustrated, and finally got out something like "You... he... meet soon!" The wife took it in a very different way, scooped the mom up in a big hug, thanked her for that, and said she loved her too. The mom gave up and stormed off. I managed to keep my face straight long enough to pull the deceased's brother aside and have a word. The brother rolled his eyes and assured me that he'd have his mom on the first plane back to Spain, and I retreated to the prep room for more tissu
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    mwm424 I work in a trendy spot in NYC... we had a new hire... middle aged relatively husky guy who joined the Engineering team. He made a HUGE fuss about getting to sit on an exercise ball instead of a chair like everyone else and IT obliged. He's had the thing like 2 days when he's headed back to his desk with a full cup a' joe, and he plops himself down on the ball and BOOM! it explodes and this goober is lying on the ground wailing in a mess of his own making
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    ToSay TheLeast I had to work an opening shift at Safeway one time and I walked into the back area to throw some cardboard in the baler. I guess the night crew got bored that night because two of them were duct taped to the walls in the back and the other guys had a pool going on of who would stay up the longest. I was way too tired to deal with that
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    ✪ [deleted] Two project managers screaming " YOU," "NO, YOU" at each other. Best meeting I ever attended.
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    Saesama Two offices next to each other share the same run of ventilation ducting. A higher- up in the upstream office hears a few underlings in the other and calls them up. HU: Hey, who's in there right now? UL: Just some of the plant guys. HU: (Supervisor) isn't in there? Or (high-level admin)? UL: Nah. HU: Oh, okay, thanks.
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    He hangs up, opens a panel on the vent duct, and throws a handful of pepper downstream, then just sits back and listens to the screaming.
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    agarret83 Off the top of my head: we were having a "red white and stew" potluck in my office yesterday; someone brought in venison stew and marked it "Bambi's dad"
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    DuoRame The company I work for bought the building next door and planned on knocking the wall out for expansion. My boss at the time (fairly big guy) decided he was going to put on a Kool-Aid man costume and bust through saying "OHHH YEAAHH".
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    ThomasJCarcetti Not much goes on here that is hilarious. It's a pretty dull environment. But one time I was walking with the boys to lunch and we pass by an empty room. The phone is on speaker and this guy on the phone is just yelling. But nobody was in the room. I found that rather humorous. Here you are going off and ain't nobody in the room.
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    Your_Lower_Back I used to work for my father, and he was very loyal to his second in command, who was the most inept person I've ever met. When he was going through a terrible divorce, he was living out of his office for like a month, as he thought his soon to be ex wife was staying at his house. Come to find out a little while later that his wife actually moved out of his house right after he moved
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    into his office, and it took him a month to realize that his house was vacant and that he was living out of his office, sleeping in a sleeping bag on the floor for absolutely no reason at all.
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    Critical Liz Fiber optics company, one of my coworkers printed a sign with our logo on it with the following caption: "Our light goes faster"
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    bestwillyson I work at a pet store in Toronto, this one day my boss tells me that we are having a show filmed at the store and I got super excited that I might get to be on TV! Turn out it was for one of those reality tv shows called Housewives something. Spent the rest of the shift watching the Housewives talking to my co workers while being filmed. It was quite funny.
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    [deleted] I worked in a small office; at most 6-8 people at a time and we did mainly programming/website design/graphic design work. One day, a bunch of us discovered the "2048" game and started playing. We got really competitive and the lot of us would play and try to get the highest score, screen shot it and write it on the glass door with the first two letters of our name.
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    Somehow, by the end of the month the entire glass door was filled with numbers and initials but everyone was too lazy to clean it up. We had a fair few people/clients/friends come over and everyone asked about the numbers and letters; we'd make up a different story each time: • It's the master key. It unlocks any security system at all time.
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    • It's the hexadecimal ● code of a new AI we wrote that always beats a human being in Candy Crush. • The numbers and letters are part of an initiation code to a secret hacker's club. It was a funny inside joke.
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    [deleted] I work in an office. Anyway, a few years ago there was a mouse running around. A lot of the older women I work with started screaming and got up on their desks. It was hilarious and fantastic.
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    NewClayburn I was new at the job. I'm sitting next to this guy, but I mostly keep to myself because I don't know anyone much yet. The guy is sitting in his chair and leans down to open a drawer in his desk. As he does, he sneezes and in doing so slams his head into the desk.
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    I didn't know how to react. This was one of the first interactions I had with the guy, but it was too ridiculous not to react. I was too shocked to even laugh about it then. I just said, "Did you seriously just do that?" It was like the dumbest thing I had ever witnessed, and I was thinking, these are the people I'm going to be working with? He just laughs it off and says, "Ha, yeah."
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    rpodovich Walked into my boss' office to find him sitting at his desk eating mayonnaise out of the jar like it was some sort of foreign delicacy. If he would have dipped the stapler into the jar it would have been less disgusting, but who the eats straight mayo?
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    Pseudonymus_Bosch I guess this is more "heard" than "saw," but a young employee at my company thought your 401(k) was the first $401,000 you earned.
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    sinverguenza The men's bathroom at a company I worked at 10 years ago had a grill in it for some reason
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    OsoDePaulie I work at a grocery store. One day, I was at the self checkout machines. Across from the machines used to be our toys/seasonal/etc. section. In that area was a box containing wiffle ball bats. Just above that, at about eye level, was a large sign. Basically, I could see everything but the person's face, and they couldn't see me. Anyways, I see this lady walk up to the box. I see her body move like she's looking around. She doesn't see anybody near her, so she
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    grabs a wiffle ball bat and starts swinging it like a sword. This lasts about 10-15 seconds before she ends up smacking herself in the face. She looks around again (she can't see me past the sign), decides no one saw her, and puts the bat back and quickly walks away. It was so hard not to bust up laughing.
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    Piggybank113 I worked at a fashion & clothes store. A woman in her mid 30s came in, took a pair of shoes from a shelf and put it in her bag, then tried to leave (we of course spotted it on CCTV). At the gate, the anti theft thingy bleeped, the guard walked up to her and asked her to open her bag. "No, I will not." • "We saw you steal a pair of shoes."
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    After a bit we put her in the back, guarded, to wait for the cops. Turns out that the left shoe was a size 6, and the right was a size 7. OH and the punishment she received was of course much worse than she would have had to pay for the shoes.
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    jessica_e87 One of my coworkers needed help on her computer so I go over to look. She had installed screen savers, various other ..... like that and not unchecked the "install toolbar" box that comes with a lot of downloads. There were so many toolbars on her web browser that she no longer could see anything on the actual browser. Just toolbars on top of toolbars.
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    pendrekky Work in a gaming store - we had 3 pc cases for sale (Ranging from 60-100$) and this older guy ~55 comes in and asks how much does "it" cost - When he hears the price he is shocked and says he'll buy all 3 immediately. He thought they were computers.
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    Cm0002 Someone had military orders to go somewhere they were REALLY excited about... ...I collaborated with IT and had a prank cancellation order sent to him, the look on his face when he opened that email...priceless
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    andrrrew I used to work at a car dealership and there was this one guy who was always really clumsy. One day he got into the golf cart we used to push cars that wouldn't start and he assumed it was in reverse. It was amazing when he hit the gas (while looking backwards) and drove forward, right into a glass door. The best part was that he stopped and sees it cracked and goes "at least it didn't break". Yeah, it broke as if that line was its cue to do so.
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    Drew_Pooo Security cameras recorded one of the employees going into the break room refrigerator to steal someone's sub. This isn't an ordinary sub theft though. This winner opened the sub, took the slices of ham off of the sub, put the sandwich back together, and then wrapped it back up in the refrigerator.
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    the_alabaster_llama Not me but back when my dad worked at a gas station, he went through the automatic car wash in an office chair.

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